My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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