But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
