I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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