Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize
