what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
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