Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
