Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
