i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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