Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
