Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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