Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
