Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
