508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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