I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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