I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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