I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
