pop tarts are not kleenex
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
