still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I supernannyed him into submission
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
