it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
