I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
