4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
