3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
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