There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
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