So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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