Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize