I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize