So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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