it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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