Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i barfeds in our rink
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
