So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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