we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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