i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
