Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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