I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
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Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
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I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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