My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
