Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

How did you manage that?

(860): View more from Connecticut

Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis

(203): View more from Connecticut

lol... jersey girls rock

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(203): How did you manage that? (860): Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis (203): lol... jersey girls rock http://tfl.nu/qjnw

Replies (66) Good night (1062) Bad night (2908)
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(623): View more from Arizona

were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.

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(623): were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds. http://tfl.nu/6mgz

Replies (41) Good night (4213) Bad night (730)
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(563): View more from Iowa

Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade

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(563): Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade http://tfl.nu/sv7y

Replies (63) Good night (58293) Bad night (1439)
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(769): View more from Mississippi

she said she likes her vagina punished

(1-769): View more from Mississippi

being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough

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(769): she said she likes her vagina punished (1-769): being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough http://tfl.nu/ts79

Replies (35) Good night (1788) Bad night (7116)
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(631): View more from New York

Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america

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(631): Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america http://tfl.nu/n1lq

Replies (27) Good night (8315) Bad night (1106)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.

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(774): I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys. http://tfl.nu/c88u

Replies (2) Good night (3107) Bad night (1474)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

You left your underwear on the fireplace

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(843): You left your underwear on the fireplace http://tfl.nu/ha55

Replies (4) Good night (2341) Bad night (693)
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(850): View more from Florida

My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.

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(850): My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper. http://tfl.nu/6jx2

Replies (15) Good night (2925) Bad night (960)
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(469): View more from Texas

You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.

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(469): You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk. http://tfl.nu/g688

Replies (2) Good night (2350) Bad night (683)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life

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(608): Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life http://tfl.nu/ljpd

Replies (15) Good night (665) Bad night (1124)
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(417): View more from Missouri

He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.

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(417): He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex. http://tfl.nu/n0fj

Replies (1) Good night (271) Bad night (620)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.

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(270): Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck. http://tfl.nu/t1ax

Replies (5) Good night (2812) Bad night (322)
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(347): View more from New York

Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?

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(347): Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it? http://tfl.nu/mhp5

Replies (1) Good night (459) Bad night (250)
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(716): View more from New York

I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.

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(716): I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me. http://tfl.nu/jxfi

Replies (5) Good night (666) Bad night (261)
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(323): View more from California

Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.

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(323): Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd. http://tfl.nu/ari3

Replies (4) Good night (235) Bad night (163)

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