oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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