Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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