you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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