why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize