The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Randomize
