So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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