you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
