Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
