So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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