she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
