You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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