watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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