Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
