i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
