Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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