Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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